That is a good question! In my walk of Christian faith, I wouldn’t have thought twice about the idea of identity, until recently when I attended a school of Christian ministry – and it seemed to be a fairly big deal but not much was really discussed about it. I kind of figured, we need to know who we are as a son or daughter of God, and that was about it.
If you asked me who I am, I would probably talk about my profession, where I live, my name, my personality and my family roles and heritage. My faith may or may not make it in there….. As social beings, we draw our identity from those around us. We find meaning and purpose and identity in community, in connection and we get a sense of who we are from those who have gone before us, those we love and from those who live and work and play around around us.
A couple of years ago now I also read a book, called ‘ The German Girl’ and it had a significant influence on me – also in the area of identity. It was about a Jewish girl - ? around 10 years old who was blonde and had blue eyes. She found herself in the war as a Jewish girl, running around Berlin with a degree of freedom that her parents didn’t have. One day she found her picture on the front page of a Nazi propaganda magazine labeled as ‘the German Girl’. This was ironic, as she was German, but she wasn’t welcome in her own homeland. In that season, she and her family had no choice but to run for their lives, and being wealthy, they were fortunate enough to have the means to do that The fruit of that season bore itself out in the generations that followed…. The German Girl…. Who was she?
Who am I? Interestingly, I am also a ‘German Girl’ although very Australian. My father grew up in the Hitler youth during the 2nd world war and came out to Australia in 1955 to work on the Victorian railways. He was served his papers to join the SS as a 17yo and the war ended when he was a few months short of his 18th birthday. I missed out on the blonde hair and the blue eyes from my father’s genes, and I have always identified more with my mother’s side of the family – with my Scottish, Irish and English heritage. But although Dad never really spoke of the things that happened back in his youth, I think the 'German Boy' has worked itself into our family line in some fairly significant ways as well. My father loved his family and I think he must have really treasured the lifestyle and opportunities that were available to him living in Australia.
I received a prophetic word a few years ago that suggested that "there is a part of the heritage of the family that long ago were believers and there is a life of the Spirit that will come upon me like a Timothy..." I have no idea what this means or indeed who in my family were believers in generations gone by. And to be serious, I am not even sure how much notice to take of this person's words (it came from someone who I didn't know at all). But there is a part of me that wonders who has been before me. My grandfather would have been a child living in Liverpool, England, around the time of the Welsh revival, and my grandmother would have been a young child living in Glasgow. Does this have anything to do with it? I have no clue.
Hebrews 12:1-2
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.
The author here, is talking about the patriarchs - Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, Moses and the Israelites - but also all the saints who have gone before us. Recently we studied in our home group the stories of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, and it is amazing how God fulfilled his promises across the multiple generations. It is also interesting that you can see Jesus in these stories - and so long before he was born. History is an interesting thing - when we look at His story, we see God using people and moving in the whole world in different ways. We are part of a bigger picture, even if we can't quite see it. Faith is a big theme in the verses preceding this verse in Hebrews 12, maybe it should be a big theme in the way we also live our lives? The way I see it, Faith is trusting in our relationship with God. It is believing in the work of the cross enough, to take a step in the right direction. It is getting a tiny glimpse of this bigger narrative and realising that our lives do indeed matter even beyond the grave. It is the place of believing in who we are in God, it connects us to the mysteries God and it is like a compass to live by. Faith is the place where we paddle a little upstream against the current or maybe even swallow our fear and step out of the boat. Faith pleases God.
The bible takes identity fairly seriously. Both Matthew and Luke list out the genealogy of Jesus – to show that the is the promised Messiah – a direct descendant of King David. It was 14 generations between Abraham and Kind David then another 14 generations to Jesus. The Israelites were called to be God’s chosen people (as are we as adopted children of God) - set apart to be a Holy Nation and for God to be their leader. We have that distinct bloodline through Jesus. But what does that mean? And is it any kind of big deal with how I live my life?
We are in the family. We have been bought with a price, we have been redeemed, chosen, set apart, set free, made righteous in the sight of God and we live at peace with our heavenly father. God’s love meets us at the place of our fears and insecurities. We are blessed with every spiritual blessing (Eph 1:3), we are made holy and righteous (Eph 1:4), we have become part of God’s family (Gal 3:26), we cannot be separated from the love of God (Rom 8:38), we can come to understand the mysteries of His will (Eph 1:9), and we are called to prosper, to hope, and to trust (Jer 29:11). We are no longer orphans, but we abide in the Godhead in love and joy (John 15: 9-11), and we are heirs and co-heirs with Christ (Rom 8:17). Christ’s victory over sin and death on the cross is our victory to live in, both in the here and now and for eternity (1 Cor 15: 56-57). We have power (Eph 1:19), protection (John 17:15) and authority (Luke 9:1) in that. Our new norm is to hunger and thirst for God’s righteousness in the world (Matt 5:6). We are sealed with the Holy Spirit as a sign of our redemption and inheritance (Eph 1: 14).
Wow – that’s a lot to take in! And good to remind ourselves from time to time.
We, together as the body of Christ, are being ‘built together to become a dwelling in which God lives by his Spirit’ (Eph 2:22) and in living this out we are called to be humble and gentle, bearing with each other in love and keeping the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace (Eph 4:2). We are called to live as children of the light, in goodness, righteousness and truth (Eph 5:9), setting our hearts on things above (Col 3:2), being thankful (Phil4:6), imitating God (Eph 5: 1) and being careful and wise (Eph 5: 15). We are called to love and honour God in all we do – to work out our own salvation with fear and trembling (Phil 2:12). Unity, love, humility, sacrifice and service (considering others before ourselves) are strong themes (Phil 1:27-30, Col 3:12-17).
Yes, but I still feel the same..... I am still the 'German Girl'. My name is Heidi. I still get up in the morning, go to work, cook the dinner, do the dishes, watch the TV, get grumpy at times, and spend time with family and friends. But there is a different Spirit at work. I have been a committed Christian for all of my adult life, so I don't really know any other framework from which I have lived. But I don't live bound by any sort of idea that this, today, is all that there is, and I don't live simply for myself and my immediate family - which is a futile and unhealthy idealism. I live with hope, and an expectation of good. I live as part of a broader worldwide body of Christ, knowing that this life is not an end itself and knowing that I am loved; that I belong. Eternally. In this life, I am an technically an orphan - my parents have passed away and I have never married. And as the youngest in the family, I was always 'the baby' and I always expected to be cared for. But that gap in my life doesn't limit me. It never will. The father hole in my heart has been filled by my heavenly father. I actually, consciously, one day gave him permission to be my Dad. This happened after my mother passed away with cancer, and my father struggled to come to terms with what that meant in his life. It felt like a role reversal the father/daughter relationship at the time, as my father was so caught up in himself that he couldn't see others' reactions to the situation or know how to father his two adult daughters. My heavenly father doesn't fail me.
Romans 8: 14-17 (The Passion Translation)
The mature children of God are those who are moved by the impulses of the Holy Spirit. And you did not receive the “spirit of religious duty,” leading you back into the fear of never being good enough. But you have received the “Spirit of full acceptance,” enfolding you into the family of God. And you will never feel orphaned, for as he rises up within us, our spirits join him in saying the words of tender affection, “Beloved Father!” For the Holy Spirit makes God’s fatherhood real to us as he whispers into our innermost being, “You are God’s beloved child!” And since we are his true children, we qualify to share all his treasures, for indeed, we are heirs of God himself. And since we are joined to Christ, we also inherit all that he is and all that he has. We will experience being co-glorified with him provided that we accept his sufferings as our own.
I guess I still live with a bit of a fear in many situations of either not being enough, or being too much. But when I look to the father, I realise that I am neither of these things. I am His and that is enough. I had a bit of a vision a few years ago now, where I was wearing a long pink dress, and the father invited me into the kitchen where we just sat and chatted. It was a place of intimacy and connection. At the time I avoided wearing pink, mainly because with a name like Heidi, I kind of avoided any 'little girl' type things like the colour pink, lace and ribbons. But pink is a significant colour. It represents both purity and power. Two things I am happy to relate to. So now I own it and will wear pink (as long as its the right shade).
I belong. And I am free! I am a citizen of Australia and a citizen of heaven in many ways! Its a bit like a dual identity - Peter Parker and Spiderman, or 'the Incredibles' is a favourite of mine. Like the German girl not really belonging in her own country. Except this is real. A couple of years ago, I was actually believing that I don't have any family, which is not true. And it was a belief that is self - limiting. It fostered in me strategies of self protection and a bit of a victim mentality. It kept me from my true identity in some ways. But God is greater, and He has shown me the lie. And although we often don't take up the privileges of heaven, they are there for us. Jesus said clearly that his disciples would do greater things than he did. Healing, deliverance, provision and hope. These are all such good gifts that the father has for us, if only we ask and seek and knock. Jesus came that we might have life, and life to the full. God really is a good Dad, and we can find our security and identity in Him.
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